1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30
September 19, 2013
One doesn't need cigarettes or alcohol (or illegal drugs) to live…but we need food to survive. You can tell almost any addict to quit, but what do you tell a food addict?
For about 21 months (2010-11), I thought I had control over food. I had willpower and a desire to lose weight. I had lost almost 100lbs. But something happened in October 2011…I hadn't lost a single pound in a few months and it was depressing. There could've been some non-scale successes, but I gave up the fight and the control. I found comfort in food again. And now I've gained back about 95% of the weight I had lost (almost 2 years later). It's scary.
I feel like an addict. I might not eat 24/7, but I think about food a lot. I find that what control I have wavers when I'm feeling emotional and sometimes when I'm "bored". I have a preference for sweets and/or savory, but will eat whatever's available. I also prefer things that have little to no prep time. My tastebuds are "louder" than my stomach. I love food and I'm not happy about it.
I need to change what and why I eat. I want control over my cravings again. I need to find other comforts in life when I'm feeling emotional or "bored". I want to be happier.
Anyway, I think I'll take a walk.
| || |
Login to select
your favorite journals
"You have not failed until you quit trying." ~Gordon B. Hickley