|Bits and Pieces Sometimes Come Together in Weird Ways...|
May 2, 2021
I haven't forgotten this is here. Just there was a bit of an orbital nightmare issue going on in the world, and the time never seemed right, so to speak.
I'm in a good place. Still in a good place since the last time I wrote things, and I've been enjoying life because of it.
I used to think that I only write when I was hurting, or needing sanity from the insanity, but the truth is that those were the things that inspired me to need to write.
I had a lot of trepidation over the last election, like a lot of people I know; now that it's over and done with, I'm sleeping easier, but there's still that lurking stress just because of who I am.
I got my second vaccination shot today; nice to know I'm not going to have to worry as much about going out in public like I'd been doing for most of last year.
I'm going to write more; it's part of a project I'm working on. It's never too late to start something.
Today's lesson is about misfortune; it happens to us all.
I know that some folks consider themselves unlucky; some people consider themselves lucky.
Do unlucky people get unhappy about other people's luck? Sure. Do lucky people feel bad for unlucky people? Sometimes. Do lucky people get unhappy at people disparaging their lucky breaks? Definitely.
I had a friend who hit the stock lottery for a million plus dollars. It changed most of the people around him; his family most of all. I for one was happy for him; to me, the money is about having the financial security to do what you want with your life rather than having to make choices of what to sacrifice or give up.
He chose to live out his dream of moving to Disneyworld, bought a house, and vanished out of most of our lives.
My then-housemate? Was angry and jealous at him. "What, we aren't good enough for him?" We had to agree to disagree. Loudly.
Twenty odd years later, he'd lost most of the money he'd made, between not reinvesting, having his family abuse him for money, and he was looking for a job again, only with a giant hole in his resume and an aversion to being managed. He'd left his friends behind and didn't have the networking connections he had, and he was in the middle of Florida as opposed to being in a tech hub.
My housemate? Laughed at his misfortune. For her, it was 'comeuppance' and 'karma'. The jealousy was still real for her, but she had also mismanaged her career so badly that I was supporting her (albeit somewhat unwillingly).
I reached out and offered to help if he needed resume critique, and he accepted. I didn't do it with the expectation of recompense or gratitude; it was just what friends do when the money doesn't matter.
There's a saying that fair weather friends are not the kind that you want to keep; the ones who stick with you through thick and thin are the ones to keep an eye out for, and who will be there for you in return.
My current housemate is someone who was there for me when I needed someone the most; they are the biggest reason my life is better.
I think what I want to say is that misfortune isn't as bad as it might seem; it shows you who your best friends are.
And I'm not saying that your friends -need- to be there to help you when you need it; sometimes we don't want or need help, other than a kind word now and again, but rather, you ought not to keep chasing the friends who head for the exits without making sure you're going to make it out in one piece.
I kinda let a lot of people go, because I thought I'd let a lot of people down. I let myself down the most of all, over and over, for years, because I didn't motivate myself enough to learn to save myself.
I know better now; and it's definitely not too late to start over. I like who I am, and I never hated myself enough to think about ending things -- at least not on a regular basis.
I've got a new plan to make better use of my time, too; I'll tell you about it sooner rather than later.