|So here's how it happened....|
October 25, 2020
Master and I are part of a BDSM club/co-op. We have a couple of groups living on our property. There's Master, me of course, and our sub Aoife. Saoirse, Master's niece by marriage, and her Master/husband Connor and their daughter Saoirse who is eight anbd their newborn son Fionnan and their slave, Pearse, named for Pádraig Pearse, who also has another Master who is his husband named Fenian, that's why I'm The Wee Fenian and there's Finian and Séan and a few others. We have eighty acres here.
Every now and again, we let new folks into our club. They need not be experienced or hardcore and they need not live on property. I am in charge of recruiting them. I met one at a recruiting event and I liked him right off. I found out that he diaries at the other site where I also write and I began to follow his writings there. A couple of weeks go by and he tells me in one PM that "reading your emails is the delight of my day". A few more days go by and we exchange phone numbers. He wanted me to get Discord, so that we could talk, since he doesn't like to text. I can't because my phone's IOS is too old. I spent three hours trying to get an older version to download with no luck.
I sent him some pics on Friday night. They weren't overly sexual, they were pics I'd posted on fetlife. I'd told him some pretty deep stuff about myself and what I've been through, prison, being raped, etc.
After the sending of the pictures, his responses seemed to go from immediate to ten or twelve minutes between responses. I didn't think anything of it at first until he tells me that he doesn't like texting and only reserves it for family. I found this odd, because we'd been texting while working for about eight hours. Later that night, I received thbis email. The first part refers to me telling him something a friend called me and me saying he could call any time because he's a person I'd get out of bed for, or in bed with...just me being flirty, as he was to me.
Jerry springer lol aw get in bed with? Hehe I'm flattered really But I think I'm starting to feel a little uncomfortable. Am I an obsession for you?
Again I am very flattered but if I could be honest I'm just being myself I'm sure anyone in my position would be themselves around you too. I understand you find me incredibly sexy and thrilling. But in all fairness I'm jist an average guy.
I'm nothing like Gerry, to hit you or command you or own you to that degree isn't my style I'm more of a bondage dirty talking lovely dovey type of guy. I do not like inflicting a crazy amount of pain at all.
Maybe you're over excited at the idea that someone just happens to treat you like a proper human being? Idk but I just feel a little uneasy. And it's not your life style it's not the drugs or the things you've been through I guess it's the way you're talking so highly of me the way you see me as good as Gerry which honestly shocks me.
You're owned and my mind just can't cope with that I've always been a respectful guy and nothing makes me smile more than making you smile.
But it seems as if late you've been kinda fixated on me. And I totally don't mind at all except well you're not my boyfriend you're a great friend at most perhaps someone to play around with but that's about it.
Do you understand? I really don't wanna come off as "leave me alone" but more of you're giving me way more attention than you would your Master or your slave or anyone else
My questions are:
1. How does he know I want him to hit me, own me or cause me pain?
2. How does he know how much time I'm spending or not spending with the others here?
3. In one message, he said he thought I was developing romantic feelings for him and might do something crazy like leave Gerry. How can you be romantic or have those feelings for someone you've just met?
4. In one message, he said that reading my messages was "his daily delight". Wasn't that leading me on?
5. Why can't I talk highly of someone, doesn't that mean he has no self esteem?
6. What is making sexual comments and inuendos to me in every message supposed to make me think?
7. He told me he'd been to medical school, but when I asked him why he wasn't working as a doctor, he blamed it on covid. Wouldn't they need more doctors now than ever? I found out from him that he went to school for medical billing.
He claimed he just wants to be FWBs and that's fine with me and I said so. I said all the right things, but I'm secretly hurt. He swore he'd call me yesterday. He didn't. Translation, I want to be friends means don't bother me.
The sad Wee Fenian