June 11, 2020
Because of my Memorial Day weekend bad episode of depression, I had to visit my GP yesterday for something to help me ride it out. It's the same symptoms before a bad one - extreme anxiety, and then the depression. It's been a while since I've thought about dying. I was about to type "killing myself" but that isn't really true. I never think about killing myself, just that really more of questioning why I am still alive. And that I wish I am dead. And that I don't see the point of living, of trying so hard to be responsible.
I don't know how the pill will work. I am suppose to take it when I need it - when the anxiety is really bad. I hope it helps. I am tired of all of these emotions. Will I ever get back to being normal?