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Emotional Mess by carol15
July 2020

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My love life?
July 25, 2020

a week or so before my period I start getting so horny. I just want to be dicked down. but I know the chances of that happening are low. There is a guy that was willing to come down and help with this, however, he is allergic to cats.

It's probably for the best he can't come down. Idk how I feel about him if anything. I also don't know how he feels about me. When we met he was all over me and that was a huge turnoff. He had also been very aggressive, all my actions were personal and about him. I needed him to take a few steps back. He backed off by a mile. I guess he doesn't do anything half-heartedly. I think I like him but I also think he is bad news. He recently was arrested for assaulting an officer and for a DUI. HA. yea...

Idk what I want and I think backing off and focusing on school and studying is what is best for me. There is this guy I have been talking to for a few months. He admitted to me that he wasn't looking for anything serious like a relationship. and tbh I am okay with that. There is still something missing there. Passion? I get that it's casual, but I want someone that is going to grab me and own me sexually. I send him a nude and his reaction seems less than impressed. The sex isn't on point either. Granted I don't enjoy sex as much as I have in the past, but there still needs to be more.

I NEED to dump him. I sent him some messages Monday and Tuesday that he didn't respond to till Friday, explaining that he was asleep and therefore didn't reply. and he apologized. He normally messages me every other day, as far as starting a conversation. I haven't responded to his apology. I want to end things, but how I end something that doesn't exist, with someone that won't care regardless.

On top of all that, there is still that man that haunts me. I can't let him go and I mean nothing to him. IDK I just want to be over it.

Anyway, it really sucks getting super horny right before my period...

I need a second nap. GN.
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